Online Dating the Old-Fashioned Way


The expression ‘online dating’ seems to crop up everywhere nowadays. Websites such as  e-Harmony, and Plenty of Fish are thrust at us constantly. It’s the cool way to try and meet the person of your dreams and, of course, totally socially acceptable.

However, meeting a partner through a dating agency wasn’t always considered to be hip. In fact, quite the opposite is true. You were sad, a social outcast, desperate even,  if you had to resort to paying an agency to introduce you to a potential partner.  The shame of it…

Let me take you back to 1996…

I had ended a six year relationship and after a few months of singledom felt it was time to go on the hunt for a new man.  I was in my late twenties and having met the majority of my previous boyfriends in pubs and clubs, I felt this was not something I wanted to do again. But how else was I realistically going to meet a decent man? My workplace was definitely not an option. Most of the guys I knew were attached, so short of bumping into ‘Mr Right’ in the street, it was unlikely to happen. I knew of a couple of girls at work who had met their partners through an agency called Dateline and although they were fairly open about the fact, they were the subject of a lot of office gossip. My mum also had a friend that had met her husband through the same agency, and had suggested that I should think about joining. I was appalled at the suggestion. I wasn’t a sad character. I didn’t need to join the ranks of the ‘desperately seeking’ .  However, over the next few weeks, the idea grew on me. So, I decided that it wouldn’t hurt just to find out a little bit more.

I was an avid reader of Cosmopolitan back then, which was one of the glossy magazines where Dateline placed their colourful ads showing cheesy grinning couples. I cut the reply coupon out, filled in my details and posted it off with apprehension.

A few days later, I received a glossy A4 folder containing various forms, leaflets and a paperback book, which told the reader how they could find love with Dateline, and featured some success stories. It sounded perfect. Too good to be true.  They convinced me to join. What could ever go wrong?

You were required to fill in a very lengthy questionnaire, mainly consisting of multiple choice questions,  which attempted to elicit as much information as possible about an individual. I recall that one of the questions asked how attractive you thought you were. The choices were average, attractive or very attractive; I boldly ticked attractive. The magical Dateline computer would then process all the answers you provided and churn out a list of perfect matches. The cost of membership was £150 per year. For that you got an initial list of six names of potential matches, and your name would also appear on lists sent to  people you were matched with. I convinced myself it was a good investment to find everlasting love.

comp pic

This is how I imagined the Dateline computer to be (Image from Carry on Loving – 1970)

A week or so later, I received my list of matches. Six names, addresses and telephone numbers of men within a 20 mile radius of my home. Reality then hit. I was going to have to pluck up the courage to contact these men. I decided to leave it a few days to get used to the idea.  Once I felt bold enough, I looked down the list of names. Which name to pick? I decided the first one was the best place to start, I was a nervous wreck. Just the kind of woman you want to call you on a Sunday evening. He answered, and I introduced myself and said I had received his name from Dateline. He informed me, in a very pompous manner, that he had met someone already. Not a pleasant experience and I decided I didn’t have the nerve to do it again. So, I decided to write a letter to the next name on the list, Jonathan. By hand, using proper writing paper – it was before the internet and email were in common use in homes, and I didn’t have the luxury of my own PC and printer back in 1996. I recall that I spent ages drafting a letter to Jonathan, and no doubt filled it with complete drivel.

Meanwhile, I received a phone call on my landline a few days later from a guy called Mark; he had received my details from Dateline as part of his list of six names. We had a brief, nervous chat, and arranged to meet in a local pub on Saturday lunchtime.

I was incredibly nervous as I walked into the pub. No photos were used by Dateline, so you had no idea what someone looked like before you met them. You relied on a few brief details exchanged beforehand.  We did find each other, and the date lasted about an hour. That was enough. He was incredibly boring and just the kind of person I didn’t want to meet, He went to great pains to tell me about how he liked to watch ‘The Magic Roundabout’ when he was ill. He told me that he liked to take his time with these things and didn’t fall in love on a first date, but he might contact me again. I wanted to tell him that he was quite safe from my attentions and not to bother contacting me again, but instead smiled sweetly and said that I understood.  I felt quite unsettled by the whole process. If he was the type of guy I was going to end up meeting, I’d rather not bother. I stopped to buy a bottle of brandy on the way home. To make things worse, when I got home, there was a reply from Jonathan waiting for me; he had met someone from outside Dateline.

That was it as far as I was concerned. I was not going to contact anyone else and if I got any more calls, I would say I wasn’t interested.

A week or so later, I got another call. My resolve not to bother went out of the window. Another date was set up. And then it started in earnest. I received call after call, night after night. I didn’t arrange to meet everyone I spoke to, but in the space of three months, I met 16 men. One day, I had a date at lunchtime and another in the evening.  I met some of them two or three times  One thing that was common throughout was that most of the men I spoke with, and met, worked in professions where there were few women, with engineering being the most common.

I also had my fair share of dating disasters along the way. I was stood up a couple of times. Bored to tears a number of  times. But if was all fairly innocent, as in no sexual encounters. In fact, there was never any suggestion of any, and to be honest nothing was further from my mind. Apart from a guy called Alex that is. We met quite a few times, and he was a bit quirky, quite different to all the others that I met. He came round to my house for a meal one night, and I had suggested that he stay over (in the spare room) so he could have a drink. I was hoping that he might sneak into my room during the night. But to my disappointment, he didn’t. I decided to take him a cup of tea the next morning, and my clumsy attempts to seduce him failed. So that was the end of that.

The last man I met through Dateline was with no 16.   Shortly afterwards, I received another letter from Jonathan telling me that he was now single. I wrote and told him that I had now met someone. And the not-so-lovely Mark did contact me again, some two months after we met. I took great delight in telling him I was inundated with male attention, and I would not be meeting him again.

And I ended up getting married (eventually) to no 16…


8 thoughts on “Online Dating the Old-Fashioned Way

  1. KinkyKrissy

    after my divorce, i tried the bar scene, i guess trying to find “mr right”. all i seemed to meet were guys that wanted a BJ in the parking lot, and a quick fuck in the back seat… i’d had enough of that BS from my ex husband…
    i met a guy (10 years older than me) in a chatroom on AOL. we eventually decided to meet up, he made a 1300 mile drive to visit me, it was my 30th bday, he’d promised to take me out for a nice dinner, drinks, and asked what i wantedor a bday present. i figured, at least probably i’ll get laid sometime that weekend……
    we met at my apartment, and really hit it off !!
    he stayed 4 days and boy did i ever get laid, i hadnt cum that many times in the past year, even by my own hand!! it seemed like every time i turned around, i saw his cock bulging in his jeans, my panties would drop to the floor, and i was cumming again. i’d never been with a man that stayed hard after he’d cum inside me, and he came inside me again and again….

    6 weeks later i flew to visit him for another 4 day weekend, the 1st day/night we spent in a “sex motel” it was a whirlwind of (my) sexual pleasure, we sucked, we fucked on the floor, the bed, desk, shower, jacuzzi, and a 1st for me, on a sex swing!!
    i lost count of how many orgasms i had, he told me the next day he’d cum inside me 11 times OMFG
    we’d spend the days sightseeing, and shopping, every night it was a new adventure in a different hotel, all with the same results, multiple orgasms for me 🙂

    6 weeks later it was xmas, he’d sent some money and gifts for my 3 kids a couple weeks before he flew to meet me… getting a last minute flight proved challenging, the closest airport was over 2 hours away. i decided to surprise him, white blouse, black skirt, black heels, thigh highs, matching lacie black thong/bra. i held up a sign with his name on it at the gate, like a “real” limo driver… LOL
    by the time we got to the parking garage, he’d already unbutton 2 more buttons on my blouse, he’d lifted my skirt and slipped his hand inside my thong, and tickled my clit, i wasnt sure how i was gonna drive if he was going to keep this up for 2 hours… thankfully he decided to drive, i sat back and let me fingerfuck me during most of the ride home….
    once we got back to my place, somehow i got bent over the trunk of my car in the parking lot,, he was behind me licking my pussy and ass. i really didnt want to get caught fucking outside my apartment, we managed to get inside the front door, he led me to the floor under the xmas tree, got between my legs and gave me a tongue lashing like i’d NEVER had before.
    i begged him to fuck me again and again, he held my legs in the air and i guided him inside my soaking wet pussy. he slowly fucked me with long strokes, sometimes letting the head slip out, and then back in balls deep again. it was the most incredible fucking i’d ever had in my life!!

    if it hadnt been for that chance chatroom meeting over 20 years ago, i’m positive i would have never met “mr right”

    Liked by 1 person

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